when the night has come, and the land is dark...
Lights off. All of them, except the floor lamp by the window that overlooks the parking lot.
Slippers on feet, phone quiet except for the occasional buzz of texts from a weary friend who's just getting out of work. Eyes tired and hair in a crazy conundrum of bobby pins and a pencil that I don't remember owning.
Intro... one of the best intros of all time...
bass line. triangle. a brief percussive whisk every measure on the 2nd beat.
Followed by Ben E. King's voice.
When the night! Has come! And the land is dark. And the moon is the only light we'll see.
No I won't be afraid. No Iiiiiiiiii won't be afraid. Just as long as you stand, stand by me.
the triangle becomes a little more courageous. Then the violins. And then, like magic, the "ooo" of the backup singers.
Stand by me. Stand by me.
If the sky that we look upon. Should tumble and fall. Or the mountains should crumble to the sea...
I won't cry. I won't cry. No Iiiiiiiii won't shed a tear. Just as long. As you stand. Stand by me.
Across the parking lot, a puppy 'yips' and a balcony full of young voices laughs. A beer is opened. Next door, the blue flicker of television in a dark apartment where a guy lives alone (he wears black cowboy boots, and looks a little like Jeff Goldblum...)
violin solo comes to a close
Darling, Darling, stand. By me. Ohhhhh stand by me. Oh stand now. Stand by me. Stand by me.
Whenever you're in trouble, won't you stand by me, ohhhhh stand by me...
posting at the end of the day usually means crashing energy and lots of alone time; resulting in less-than-chipper posts. If I wrote at the beginning of every day, I would leave a much cheerier impression.
However, this is the nature of journaling.
A brief portrait of recent things...
Friday:
1. the rain came. completely drastic cold snap, pouring rain, had to turn the heat on in the car and put on fingerless gloves to type when I got to work really early.
2. late Friday morning, a funeral for a friend of the family. She was only 45. The memorial service was heartbreaking. One of the most heartbreaking moments ever.
3. After the funeral, drove home through country roads alone and upset, got stuck in construction traffic two blocks from my house. Construction guy screwed up with where he was trying to direct me, and embarrassed about his mistake, he yelled at me... something along the lines of "get the hell over to the next lane". Then the window wipers pushed the rain off my windshield and he saw how upset I was. He gave me a super apologetic look and mouthed the words "my mistake" about the lane misunderstanding, which was nice. When it was my turn to go, I passed about 5 other construction workers... the last one was on the walkie talkie with guy #1, and as I passed him, he nodded his head and gave me the kindest wave. It seemed like the first guy had just asked him to do something nice. It's funny... you go into certain events with definite expectations of what they'll be like, and what you will remember about that day. But looking back on Friday's events, I will always remember someone at the funeral standing alone, with hair poking up in the back like a little boy's and a perfectly pressed suit, and then I will remember my teeth chattering in the rain on the drive home, and the kind wave of two construction workers. You really can't plan the cinematic moments in life. They just happen to you when you're least in the mood to experience them.
4. When I thought my drama was over for the day, I pulled over at home to get a sweater and try to get myself together before heading back to the office. I was annoyed when I heard the sound of someone's television blasting into my apartment-- it sounded like the women's finals in tennis... those ungodly half-grunt, half-screams. The sound went on and on, and finally, I stormed over to the window, sick and tired of getting noise from the apartment below mine this summer. Peeking out, I saw someone lying in the parking lot. Under, or next to, a FedEx truck. The blood left my face so fast, it's amazing I didn't faint... it looked like a woman was pinned under a huge delivery truck, screaming her brains out.
Then I heard a strange thing-- someone standing next to her, sounding annoyed: "well, what do you want? Do you WANT me to call an ambulance? Just tell me what you want."
The f***???
I ran downstairs, cell phone in hand, into the pouring rain. A fed ex delivery woman had been running back to her truck, slipped on the drenched curb, and dislocated her shoulder badly. She was in an incredible amount of pain. My neighbor was on the phone... with fed ex, as I found out, and NOT 911... oh lord. It felt like hours before I managed to get the story straight, ensure that help was on the way, try to figure out how and what to say to someone who was literally almost losing her mind with pain if she moved even half an inch.
The rain fell and fell and fell, and I watched her carefully to make sure that she was staying awake and as coherent as possible, and I kept saying maternal, empty promises like "they're almost here, they're almost here, I can hear sirens almost" and tried to say anything helpful... and then the fire truck and the ambulance came and I just headed back out of the rain, dazed and confused by one of the all-time weirdest days ever.
5. Spent the weekend relaxing, spent a LOT of time alone, just thinking and not thinking and trying to catch up on the frenetic energy that's been spent lately.
6. Except for the part where Thad and I had a drunken wrestling match on his kitchen floor as Meredith and Tom cheered us on (or groaned, horrified what nerds we are. Maybe both.) It's been at least 10 years since someone flipped me over their head. It's Monday night, and I still have linoleum burns on my knees, bruises under my ribs, and really sore pec muscles. I start laughing every time I think about it... the last thing I remember saying was "Tom, anyone in this room would wrestle each other for your love, because we all love you" and then tossing back another sip of red wine before Thad-- the human gust of wind-- was pushing my face in the cat bowl. Oh... god... what would I do without these three....
7. I have found the best cup of coffee in Colorado. Ironically, it's just the dark roast drip coffee at Ziggy's in Longmont. It makes me want to be a better person... oh man. It's good.
8. I'm making a couple of mix cds... Meredith's mix that I put on my ipod for her bday, Thad's mix that I've been working on for MONTHS, and a mix for Lance that has strangely morphed into sort of a vintage classics piece. Some latin, some jazz, a little Velvet Underground, Etta James, Ben E. King's "Stand By Me"... I love making mixes, but I'm perplexed by how each one takes on a life of its own (and I'm forced to put songs on people's mixes that I don't even necessarily want to at the time... it's like being hypnotized or something)
9. Portrait of a Monday: went to work. thought very deep thoughts. made the world's worst pot of coffee-- it's like I'm drunk or something when I try to make coffee at work. Barrista for 8 months, can't even fake it in our kitchen downstairs... it's really weird. Came home, ate shite for dinner, Fatal Attraction was on AMC (why?! Why did I watch 75% of it?! Being eccentric has its toll)... watched some olympics and worked on my mix cds... strangled iTunes when it stopped playing songs, and had to spend the next two hours reading forums online and re-installing shite...
10. exhausted. To bed, then to work, then hopefully out for a run, then a cello practice for wedding #3, then vino with Lancer as we sit next to big open windows that smell like summer, then Troy's wedding that Robin and I are filming, and finding a new job, and endless hours of resume-tailoring and putting stamps on envelopes...
11. I. Love. Summer.
12. And I love babbling into my laptop until I can't even think straight as a means of unwinding and then passing out in my awesomely comfortable tree bed.
ain't no sunshine when she's gone,
the vintage mix girl
Slippers on feet, phone quiet except for the occasional buzz of texts from a weary friend who's just getting out of work. Eyes tired and hair in a crazy conundrum of bobby pins and a pencil that I don't remember owning.
Intro... one of the best intros of all time...
bass line. triangle. a brief percussive whisk every measure on the 2nd beat.
Followed by Ben E. King's voice.
When the night! Has come! And the land is dark. And the moon is the only light we'll see.
No I won't be afraid. No Iiiiiiiiii won't be afraid. Just as long as you stand, stand by me.
the triangle becomes a little more courageous. Then the violins. And then, like magic, the "ooo" of the backup singers.
Stand by me. Stand by me.
If the sky that we look upon. Should tumble and fall. Or the mountains should crumble to the sea...
I won't cry. I won't cry. No Iiiiiiiii won't shed a tear. Just as long. As you stand. Stand by me.
Across the parking lot, a puppy 'yips' and a balcony full of young voices laughs. A beer is opened. Next door, the blue flicker of television in a dark apartment where a guy lives alone (he wears black cowboy boots, and looks a little like Jeff Goldblum...)
violin solo comes to a close
Darling, Darling, stand. By me. Ohhhhh stand by me. Oh stand now. Stand by me. Stand by me.
Whenever you're in trouble, won't you stand by me, ohhhhh stand by me...
posting at the end of the day usually means crashing energy and lots of alone time; resulting in less-than-chipper posts. If I wrote at the beginning of every day, I would leave a much cheerier impression.
However, this is the nature of journaling.
A brief portrait of recent things...
Friday:
1. the rain came. completely drastic cold snap, pouring rain, had to turn the heat on in the car and put on fingerless gloves to type when I got to work really early.
2. late Friday morning, a funeral for a friend of the family. She was only 45. The memorial service was heartbreaking. One of the most heartbreaking moments ever.
3. After the funeral, drove home through country roads alone and upset, got stuck in construction traffic two blocks from my house. Construction guy screwed up with where he was trying to direct me, and embarrassed about his mistake, he yelled at me... something along the lines of "get the hell over to the next lane". Then the window wipers pushed the rain off my windshield and he saw how upset I was. He gave me a super apologetic look and mouthed the words "my mistake" about the lane misunderstanding, which was nice. When it was my turn to go, I passed about 5 other construction workers... the last one was on the walkie talkie with guy #1, and as I passed him, he nodded his head and gave me the kindest wave. It seemed like the first guy had just asked him to do something nice. It's funny... you go into certain events with definite expectations of what they'll be like, and what you will remember about that day. But looking back on Friday's events, I will always remember someone at the funeral standing alone, with hair poking up in the back like a little boy's and a perfectly pressed suit, and then I will remember my teeth chattering in the rain on the drive home, and the kind wave of two construction workers. You really can't plan the cinematic moments in life. They just happen to you when you're least in the mood to experience them.
4. When I thought my drama was over for the day, I pulled over at home to get a sweater and try to get myself together before heading back to the office. I was annoyed when I heard the sound of someone's television blasting into my apartment-- it sounded like the women's finals in tennis... those ungodly half-grunt, half-screams. The sound went on and on, and finally, I stormed over to the window, sick and tired of getting noise from the apartment below mine this summer. Peeking out, I saw someone lying in the parking lot. Under, or next to, a FedEx truck. The blood left my face so fast, it's amazing I didn't faint... it looked like a woman was pinned under a huge delivery truck, screaming her brains out.
Then I heard a strange thing-- someone standing next to her, sounding annoyed: "well, what do you want? Do you WANT me to call an ambulance? Just tell me what you want."
The f***???
I ran downstairs, cell phone in hand, into the pouring rain. A fed ex delivery woman had been running back to her truck, slipped on the drenched curb, and dislocated her shoulder badly. She was in an incredible amount of pain. My neighbor was on the phone... with fed ex, as I found out, and NOT 911... oh lord. It felt like hours before I managed to get the story straight, ensure that help was on the way, try to figure out how and what to say to someone who was literally almost losing her mind with pain if she moved even half an inch.
The rain fell and fell and fell, and I watched her carefully to make sure that she was staying awake and as coherent as possible, and I kept saying maternal, empty promises like "they're almost here, they're almost here, I can hear sirens almost" and tried to say anything helpful... and then the fire truck and the ambulance came and I just headed back out of the rain, dazed and confused by one of the all-time weirdest days ever.
5. Spent the weekend relaxing, spent a LOT of time alone, just thinking and not thinking and trying to catch up on the frenetic energy that's been spent lately.
6. Except for the part where Thad and I had a drunken wrestling match on his kitchen floor as Meredith and Tom cheered us on (or groaned, horrified what nerds we are. Maybe both.) It's been at least 10 years since someone flipped me over their head. It's Monday night, and I still have linoleum burns on my knees, bruises under my ribs, and really sore pec muscles. I start laughing every time I think about it... the last thing I remember saying was "Tom, anyone in this room would wrestle each other for your love, because we all love you" and then tossing back another sip of red wine before Thad-- the human gust of wind-- was pushing my face in the cat bowl. Oh... god... what would I do without these three....
7. I have found the best cup of coffee in Colorado. Ironically, it's just the dark roast drip coffee at Ziggy's in Longmont. It makes me want to be a better person... oh man. It's good.
8. I'm making a couple of mix cds... Meredith's mix that I put on my ipod for her bday, Thad's mix that I've been working on for MONTHS, and a mix for Lance that has strangely morphed into sort of a vintage classics piece. Some latin, some jazz, a little Velvet Underground, Etta James, Ben E. King's "Stand By Me"... I love making mixes, but I'm perplexed by how each one takes on a life of its own (and I'm forced to put songs on people's mixes that I don't even necessarily want to at the time... it's like being hypnotized or something)
9. Portrait of a Monday: went to work. thought very deep thoughts. made the world's worst pot of coffee-- it's like I'm drunk or something when I try to make coffee at work. Barrista for 8 months, can't even fake it in our kitchen downstairs... it's really weird. Came home, ate shite for dinner, Fatal Attraction was on AMC (why?! Why did I watch 75% of it?! Being eccentric has its toll)... watched some olympics and worked on my mix cds... strangled iTunes when it stopped playing songs, and had to spend the next two hours reading forums online and re-installing shite...
10. exhausted. To bed, then to work, then hopefully out for a run, then a cello practice for wedding #3, then vino with Lancer as we sit next to big open windows that smell like summer, then Troy's wedding that Robin and I are filming, and finding a new job, and endless hours of resume-tailoring and putting stamps on envelopes...
11. I. Love. Summer.
12. And I love babbling into my laptop until I can't even think straight as a means of unwinding and then passing out in my awesomely comfortable tree bed.
ain't no sunshine when she's gone,
the vintage mix girl
posted by JustJane at
11:36 PM
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