after a hard day of work, go to the color wheel

(* Photo/illustration by Thad Napp: Filmmaker, BFF, Photoshop Genius, appreciator of dorky movie nights that include: Dales Pale Ale (1) Beer Cozy (1) Bag of Popcorn (1) Diet Soda to Restore Me to Adorable and Awake after VERY Long Day of Work So I Can Chug some Downer in the form of Booze (1) )


I hate leaving a long day of work... completely starving... only to find myself standing in King Soopers with the Monday night dinner crowd, at a complete loss for what to buy and dangerously close to biting through my purse straps for nutrients.

Tonight I was in one of those moods where I felt like I wouldn't even date me. Wandering up and down the aisle, I couldn't decide on anything. I'd flip through the free recipes, stare down the shrimp on ice and flirtatiously eye the zucchini, but nothing looked like anything I felt like giving the time of day to. What privilege, to wander through the grocery store and be too snobby for the food...
I went my typical weird route and voted based on color schemes instead of anything else (flavor-- logic-- balanced diet). Thirty minutes later, I was driving home with tri-colored rotini, red peppers, green beans, mushrooms, vodka sauce, two Asian pears, a box of Life cereal and a major attitude adjustment.

It's funny how the right groceries can really save the day...

I spent the weekend making a responsibility parfait:

1. Mile High Sci Fi with my posse of boys-- a Mystery Science Theater-esque showing of B movies in the Tivoli with comedians (including Josh Blue of Last Comic Standing) doing the parody voiceover
2. Worked out
3. Applied feverishly to new job
4. Wrote a ridiculous, embarrassing email to the comic who runs Mile High Sci Fi to see if he'd audition me
5. Feverishly wrote cover letters
6. Wrote to my posse of boys to tell them, in embarrassing detail, how humiliating I can be when I email strangers after watching dorky B movies
7. Feverishly updated my resume
8. Posse of boys came back to my apartment to watch Predator with Mike Nelson (of MST3K fame) commentary on MP3
9. Fell asleep, woke up, worked out
10. Feverishly applied to another new job...

That was no parfait. That was a boring list.

The comedy dude wrote me back and said he'd meet me for coffee next week. If only 9News would take me to coffee next week. IS CHIVALRY DEAD?
I'm a lady. Jobs should be throwing their coats over mud puddles for me.

I'm heading into the craziest production month ever, with the exception of Maine which doesn't count... I have 8 different families to film, and each family will be filmed twice. LORD have mercy. Interview-a-palooza next week in an abandoned college classroom with big, bright, blinding lights in their face, and then following them with cameras at their home saying helpful things like "can you do that again? But completely differently?" and "can you pretend like your daughter is a llama, and talk to her in llama speak?"
Well. Not really. But pretty darn close.

A lady is yelling at her kids on my tv. NOT if it's after 5, before 9, or on a weekend... and... click.

Everyone in the known universe is getting engaged and/or turning a year older this week. Awww. It's April tomorrow, and I'm in sweatpants and a fleece. Come on, Spring...

My brilliant thing to write about is gone. I lost it immediately after consuming white, red and green pasta with white, green and red veggies. Time to call it a day.

(What's that? Time to call Jane if you have a job for her?)
(Oh. Ok. I'll just keep checking my email then.)

ps- I have an unhealthy obsession with the Tivoli. I'm going back tomorrow just because I have a casting call downtown and, oh! How lucky! I'll be right by the theater for a 7pm showing of Chop Shop.

-Mae West.